


New Species

by hiddenlongings



Category: The Dresden Files - Jim Butcher
Genre: Alien Abduction, Alien Perspective, Aliens, Alternate Universe, Crack, Fake Science, M/M, Poor misguided aliens, Violence, Zoo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-05
Updated: 2014-02-05
Packaged: 2018-01-11 03:13:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,305
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1167980
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hiddenlongings/pseuds/hiddenlongings
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You would think highly advanced aliens, capable of space travel and other technological marvels well beyond the ken of homo sapiens wouldn’t be quite so spectacularly stupid.  Alien abductions were a regular feature in humanities books, movies, and pornographic fantasy.  Humans were depicted as something like particularly obstinate cockroaches; plentiful and hard to kill but always a little something less than anything that launched their attacks against Earth.  </p><p>Granted the vast majority of humanity had no idea that magic wielding ill-tempered wizards actually existed.</p><p>Thankfully, neither did the poor unsuspecting aliens.</p>
            </blockquote>





	New Species

I don't think anyone wants to know the strange and twisty path that made me write this fanfic.  I will say that it all started with [this](http://imgur.com/hINj1xf).  I will also say that I read more wiki pages then was probably healthy.

 

* * *

The Vlorck were a proud race.  Intellectually superior to the vast majority of the sentient beings that had evolved throughout the universe they roamed freely and studied the dominant species from each life sustaining world that they discovered.  

Glorp was proud to be the lead scientist on this particular expedition.  It had taken many cycles for he/she/it to reach this proud position and he/she/it was very eager to begin the process of discovery on the latest world that they had discovered.

Lesser scientists quickly took readings of the atmosphere. 78.09% nitrogen, 20.95% oxygen, 0.93% argon, 0.039% carbon dioxide.  A fairly regular mix that would work well with only some minor calibrations needed for the environmental controls in the new enclosure.  A lucky break this; it would mean a greater possibility remained for possible captive breeding on the home world and closer study without a need for specialised suits.  What a money saver!

Glorp slid easily across the metal floor one of his/her/it's arms reaching out to delicately calibrate the entrance pen.  The study bots had been sent ahead and were even now scoping out for a healthy specimen.  Glorp felt a slight sadness that they might cause this new species some distress but hopefully it would recover from the shock.  They had had several specimens collapse from the shock of transport and while autopsy was an interesting option it was still not the preferred route.  Killing a creature for science was a private horror that Glorp hoped never actually happened to him/her/it.  Scientists had been known to collapse from the shock of seeing an innocent creature, no matter how mean their intelligence, die from the extraction.

While he/she/it kept one eye on the readings Glorp allowed another eye to flip back towards the reading pad that held the information that the bots had been able to discern before their abrupt destruction.  It wasn't much.  They had only managed to survive for a number of hours before they had been brought down by a shaggy creature that appeared to share a commensal relationship with the dominant species.  The four legged beast had shown an alarming number of yellowish protrusions from its gaping maw before the camera had abruptly cut out.

Glorp had studied the video repeatedly and he/she/it still couldn't figure out what the protuberances could be for.

Before its demise the bot had managed to get several long videos that showed the dominant species in all its...glory.

Truthfully Glorp had never seen such an odd looking species.  These creatures seemed to have descended from a very unique evolutionary line that had never taken root on any of the other life sustaining planets that the Vlorck had visited.

Four long limbs erupted from a relatively large body.  Two strangely enough seemed to exist solely for transport; while the poor things only had two more limbs to use for holding things and manipulating their surroundings. How did they manage to pick anything up with just two?  Another stranger feature was the organs that they used to see the world around them.  They seemed firmly planted in their heads and although they moved readily enough around their sockets the aliens actually had to turn their heads around completely in order to see what was behind them.

They did seem to share the same protrusions that the smaller creature's mouth had had.  Although the video couldn't pick up a lot of the detail it did seem like they had a lot and they showed them often.

Perhaps they had something to do with communication?

The aliens showed them constantly and moved their mouths in strange patterns while looking at each other.

Honestly they all looked alike to Glorp.  Certainly their coats, restrained to their heads oddly enough, had a certain variety of colors but that didn't seem to be at all what they were focused on.  Another difference that set each of them apart from each other was the strange cloth that they covered themselves with.  Apparently the delicate little things needed to fabricate their own protective layers and couldn't create it naturally.

The creatures also spent a lot of time putting things into their mouths.  It seemed to be a worldwide cultural phenomenon and Glorp noted that it might have something to do with meeting dietary needs.  The creatures bodies gave off heat prodigiously but they didn't seem to absorb nutrients from the air in the same way that the Vlorck did.  True they seemed to inhale it readily enough but that was obviously not enough to keep up with the demands of an apparently raging inferno of a metabolism system.  The vets would need to ensure that they took a fair scan of the items that these creatures consumed so that they wouldn't starve them to death.  That could wait for a couple of hours.  The Vlorck's would remain in orbit for several planetary rotations before they returned with their two new specimens.  More than enough time to gather more information about the creatures natural environment.

The bots had homed in on an apparently healthy male of the species before they had been destroyed and a tracker had been released that gave them the coordinates for their newest acquisition.

New specimens were carefully selected; they needed to be very healthy and were ideals of their species.  If breeding or cloning was going to happen they needed to get it right the first time.  Thankfully this species seemed to have a very social bent and were willing and actually preferred to spend time with each other.  Another expense saved since they wouldn't have to create separate enclosures.  

Glorp leaned forwards excitedly as he/she/it pressed the button that would bring  up their specimen as well as a fair chunk of space that would ensure that nothing was lost in the matter transfer.

The small tank was kept at the optimal temperature and atmosphere and would ensure that they could check the specimen for diseases and dangerous bacterium.  The tank lit up with a soft glow as the transfer began to take effect and Glorp could feel his/her/it's eyes weave excitedly through the air.  When he/she/it caught sight of what they had captured all 6 of his/her/its sockets withdrew backwards in shocked dismay.  

It would seem their newest specimen had been in the middle of mating when it had been captured and the radius of the transfer meant that it's chosen mate had arrived with it.  Not usually a problem actually.  The preferred to let their specimens keep their chosen mates if at all possible to help aid in their acceptance of their new circumstances.  It was just, generally if two specimens were captured at the same time they were two separate genders.  

It would seem they had caught two healthy males in their net rather than a male and a female.  So not only did they both lack the protective coating that the species apparently preferred but the specimens readings burned high from the excitement of breeding lending them more aggression than was normally expected.

Not to say that they hadn't expected some aggression. Even with the minor scenes of normal life that they had captured it had become apparent that violence was an expected outcome from a variety of social situations.  The creatures wrapped their arms around each other in violent tussles and they had even seen two males knock each other to the ground in some sort of territorial dispute over a watching female.  The female had made her opinion known when she hit the larger of the two males in the reproductive organs so it would seem even the smaller more fragile gender of the species had a great deal of say in any mating that happened.

Glorp recoiled backwards as quickly as he/she/it could and nearly knocked over a fragile piece of machinery when the larger of the two males, although they were both at least twice as large as he/she it was, gently disengaged from his smaller mate and rushed the glass.  He stopped before he could hit the clear barrier but he opened his mouth and showed his white protuberances in a threat display that made it firmly clear to Glorp that they were a weapon of sorts.

He quickly gave the glass a light tap as though he was checking for something.  The smaller male, though again he still probably outweigher him/her/it by quite a bit, stood to his full height he looked around at the room surrounding him.  He/she/it could see him checking off the number of Vlorck's in the room and studying the scientific instruments that filled it.  His eyes were a strange color that she had never seen before.  It appeared to match up rather spectacularly with a widespread breed of plant life that covered most of this species natural environment and his short coat was a mixture of the darkness of space and the hull of the ship.  His nakedness allowed Glorp to note the existence of a patchy coat that seemed to cover his chest and groin it too was that strange mix of colors.  Glorp made a mental note, external genetalia before he/she/it looked once more at his face.  He/she/it could see the intelligence that gleamed in those deeply inset eyes and he/she/it felt a moment's fear before the sound of shattering glass brought his/her/it's eye stalks back to the larger male.

His hand was thrust out in front of him, and if the sensors were reading the anomaly correctly, after thrusting some sort of powerful blast of energy that had broken the thick glass as though it was made of the flimsiest of materials. This ones coat was a much more uniform color that was offset by eyes that a slightly darker shade of the same color.  Glorp cringed backwards at the ferocious speed of the specimen, obviously a type of predator, as he lunged out of the enclosure.  He/she/it could see that the glass dug deeply into the bare pads of his bipedal paws, leaving behind trails of crimson.  This bright smear was the only sign that the creature was at all injured.  He seemed to ignore any sort of pain as he lunged forwards and managed to grab hold of one of his/her/it's arms with a brutal grip that seemed to take no effort at all.  He/she/it could feel the wrenching snap as his/her/it's skeletal system gave way and Glorp could not restrain the shriek of agony that erupted from his/her/it's lips.

He/she/it was shocked when the specimen abruptly released his grip.  But Glorp could feel his/her/it's eyes widen in shocked horror he failed to react as any sort of civilized being would.  He had apparently only let him/her/it go because he/she/it had been dragged out of his way and he headed directly toward a viewport that allowed the Vlorck to see the calm tranquility of space.

His reaction was neither calm nor tranquil.

The bellow that erupted from his throat brought the entirety of the scientific crew to the ground as they writhed in agony against the onslaught of tremendous noise.

Glorp barely managed to squint open his/her/its eyes enough to see the delicate paws of the smaller male as he strolled gracefully past him/her/it.  His low rumble that slipped past his open maw vibrated through the air and seemed to vibrate through Glorps chest in an endless wave that made him/her/it shudder.

Both specimens had obviously taken note of the Vlorck's reaction to their vocalizations.  Whenever one of the crew began to recover they would be brought crashing to the floor again by a tremendous roar.

The two males went swiftly through the room and they even pulled Glorp out of his/her/its instinctive curl and studied him/her/it with interest.  Murmurs of noise that they were obviously trying to keep comfortably low made Glorp shudder in pain before they drew away from him/her/it.

It seemed an eternity before they finally seemed to feel they had seen enough.  The atmosphere must have been taking its toll on both of them; but the only difference that Glorp could see was that their lungs were beginning to bellow more frequently as they struggled to acclimate to the chemical differences.  Another low murmur back and forth.  Communication? And the larger male reached forwards and with a twist of his hand there was a sudden split as the universe parted before him.

Glorp squealed in fright as the atmosphere billowed through and he/she/it caught a taste of what the specimens were used to breathing.  He/she/it caught a brief glimpse of a white landscape that seemed to go on forever before both males stepped through into the biting chill and the rip closed neatly behind them.

It was only later as Glorp and the other Vlorcks were desperately trying to put their laboratory to rights that Glorp realized the smaller male had taken a small collection of easy to transport items with him.  Including his/her/it's pad.  

Glorp marked the losses down on a new pad as well as adding a note to their encyclopedic information.

This was a planet that the Vlorck's would NOT be coming back to for further study.


End file.
